10 years

Holy crap! It has been 10 years since Shark and I said YES across the altar. Oh my goodness, I am even MORE in love with him now than I was walking out of the Salt Lake Temple doors.

I never imagined that I would still get butterflies when he smiles at me. I never imagined that I would still get giddy when he holds my hand. I never imagined that I would still melt when he kisses me. I never imagined that I would still feel this way after 10 years. And still getting butterflies, still getting giddy, and still melting, after 10 years, makes me soooooooo excited for the next 10 years, 20 years, 50 years!

So much has happened in the 10 years of our Collard Family. We've had open heart surgery, baby #1, a pacemaker, baby #2, c-section, debt, no debt, more debt, moved to CO, moved to UT, bought a house, PPD, anxiety attacks, a kindergartner, vacations, trips to WI, funerals, weddings, births, deaths, stitches, broken bones, TV show appearances, MMA fights, paragliding flights, deer hunting, blades made, blades broken, new hobbies discovered, soccer games, tball games, karate performances, tumbling performances, preschool graduations, mohawks, birthdays, and so much more!

Honestly, these 10 years have been absolutely amazing. I have fallen more in love with Shark, and adding Danger and the Colonel to our little family has just grown that love to beyond whatever imagined possible. I love my eternal family and am so very grateful for my Heavenly Father, for all He has blessed me with. I am grateful that He knows me, and loves me.

10 years down, eternity to go!

Well, hello

Hi there. Soooooo, there has been alot that has happened in the past, what, year since my last post? Yeah. Lots and lots has happened. My boys just won't STOP growing! K1 is 6 now, like seriously! Oh, and he's like a giant, he's into size 7/8 clothes. Yeah. And K2 is still my little dude, he still looks like a little guy, he'll turn 4 in March, and he is finally into his 3T clothes. They are still the sweetest, cutest, most awesome boys in the whole world. I sure do love my boys. Shark is still working in Lehi, he's still making that drive. He's still a rockstar. :) I'm back in school, online school, but hey, it's still school. I had to take a step back and drop a few classes, apparently being a mom and taking classes is something I have to learn to juggle, and figure out something that works for me. I'm still figuring it out. Danger loves kindergarten, he has started to read everything, and he is learning soooo much! The Colonel is in his first year of preschool, and he is loving it, granted it's one day a week, and he's been sick for the past month, but he still loves it when he goes. Danger lost his 2 bottom teeth right around his birthday, and he is so excited. When he put his teeth under his pillow, he came down at 5am to show me what the Tooth Fairy had brought him. He thinks the Tooth Fairy is the coolest ever. She folded the dollar bill into a ring for his first tooth, and into a sword for his second tooth. He absolutely loves it, the Tooth Fairy has mad skills, even if it's just a single dollar bill. I absolutely love this family of mine. Last week, I was sitting on the couch after dinner, I was crocheting (of course!) and the boys were just playing with cars in the living room. The TV wasn't on, there was nothing to distract me or my boys. I got to sit and just watch them play together. I got to sit and appreciate the blessings that I have in my life. I know my having these boys is an absolute miracle, and I absolutely LOVE the quiet moments when that thought really hits me. It brings such a peace to me. I am so very grateful for these sweet things and beautiful blessings in my life. I love that I recognize them as blessings. :)

I know I have been missing for a whole, but I do plan to get back into blogging more often, you know, making it a regular thing again.

Here are a bunch of pictures....

New obsessions

So basically it sort of started at Christmas when I got my FitBit Flex. I absolutely LOVE it. l immediately started searching about it. And I learned as much as I could about it. I downloaded the app to my Android phone and immediately changed all the stats and created a profile. I started searching for and adding friends. I even linked it to my Facebook and set it to make a daily stats update to my timeline. I never do that, I hate having apps post stuff for me. But this whole exercising thing was awesome. I felt I was truly doing something to help myself and even though it wasn't a whole heck of a lot, I still felt it was something.

I bought a treadmill in January, call me a New Years Resolutioner or whatever, but I was determined to get into shape. Not that I felt I was particularly out of shape, but I was exhausted. I have 2 little monster boys that keep me on my toes, but I felt I shouldn't be out of breath after going up our half flight of stairs to help my 3yo go potty. That just wasn't cutting it for me. I got a pair of used running shoes at the thrift store for $3, good find, but we'll have to see how they hold up or if they even really work for me. My husband's family decided to do an Atkins diet starting in January (right before my birthday!!!) so I joined it. I also decided to join in a DietBet type thing called The Meltdown Challenge, and even though I totally won and lost my allotted amount of weight (I lost 15lbs!) I forgot to do a final weigh in, oh well. I was getting my steps in almost every night, and if I didn't get them, I walked on the treadmill and watched a show. And I've got this last bit of momma-pooch I'd like to get rid of. I'm not looking to lose 50 pounds, just a few, and I'm more worried about getting into shape and getting healthy!!

Last month, I went in for a cardiac cauterization and the doctor enlarged one of my ventricles with a balloon, to help with the blood flow. Shark talked to the cardiologist because he had some questions.

1) Would exercising help strengthen my heart, and essentially give us more time before the heart transplant, or would it weaken it and make the heart transplant happen sooner?
-------Yes, exercising would strengthen my heart, it would give me more energy, it would also give me more time, but it wouldn't really make a difference.

2) About how long we were looking at until I needed a heart transplant? What was the time frame? Single digits or double digits?
-------About in there. Around 10 years is when they will really start to look at it, unless something else starts happening....

So call this a new exercise obsession, call it me trying to gain control over something I have NO control over whatsoever, call it a last ditch effort, call it what you want. I guess I feel a desperate need to change something and right now, I have all the tools to get fit and get in shape and exercise and run. Yeah my ankles and calves are burning but I am so proud that I've started something and that I've done it 2 days in a row.

I downloaded an app called C25K- Couch 2 5k. And I am so excited to use it and started jogging/running. In reading over the details of the training, I guess I'm not supposed to run on days back to back but I didn't see that until last night/this morning, so I'll be switching to either just walking tonight or yoga or Zumba or something. Part of me also feels like if I take a day off, that'll be the end of my jogging run...

I signed up for a 5K in May. My sister and I are going to do the Color Me Rad. Danger said he wanted to do it with us, we'll see how that goes. I'm not planning (nor even thought about) to RUN or even JOG the 5k, more like a brisk walk, that's all I'm aiming at. I got Danger some shades and a bought him a Color Me Rad shirt from the clearance section when I registered, he can run free. I'm pretty excited.

I know in the past, I've used my heart condition as a fall back, "Oh, I can't do that, I have a heart condition." "I can't do all those setups, run that whole mile, I have a heart condition." But when I think of the recent past, I gave birth! I've been shocked (cardio verted) like 5 times, I've hiked up mountains, I've done all sorts of things. Why on earth would my heart condition hold me back from exercising? So I'm done making excuses, I'm just going to DO!

I also feel like I have no other options. I guess part of me feels like my life is a stake, and running could be the answer... And if that's the case, than that's a pretty easy answer. So that's my plans and that's why I've got a sudden obsession with running.

Goodbye 2014

Now we say goodbye to 2015. Here's how we ended this year. The boys visited with Santa. Danger asked him for a scooter (apparently he was on the Nice List cuz he got one!) And it was the Colonel's first time seeing the Man in Red. No tears, just chilling. Maybe it was cuz his strong, brave big brother was there. 

I *love* to see my boys together. I love the smiles, I love seeing how much they love one another. I see how much Shark loves being a dad and how much the boys love him and each other. 

We went to Santa's Village to look at the lights. Danger LOVED it. I swear, he ran around in circles, around the trees for about 15 minutes. 

I get to wrestle with these boys all day. Some days it's good, some days it's bad. But I generally enjoy it. :) I like being their momma. These silly boys are so cute and fun. 

We took the train down to the airport to catch our flight to WI. It was stressful but it was such a relief to not pay for parking. 

My cuties on the plane. They loved watching the workers outside the plane, loading our luggage, the plane being towed to the runway. They loved it. 

Shark, Danger and my old man out looking for a practice arrow. Danger LOVED hanging out with grandpa and dad. 

Danger doodled on the white board. This is a picture of him. 

Colonel looking hopeful at the snow outside. It was a white Christmas. 

And what's a trip to WI with a hospital visit for Mom? Just my heart freaking out again. It lasted about a day and then was gone. 

Aunt G getting cuddles from Danger. 

Colonel just chilling at brunch. 

Saying goodbye to grandma at the airport. 

Family photo 2014!

Making pizza for our New Year's. We held ours on Tuesday because dad had to work on the 31st. We went all out with fondue, pizza, sparkle juice and games. 

It's been a wonderful 2014. Colonel joined our family, Danger started preschool, and is now potty trained. It has been awesome and amazing. 

I am so excited for 2015! Bring it on. 

What. The. Heck.

So I had this baby last week.... JK. It's been 8 months. But I swear last week he was nearly scooting around the living room. 

And now he's climbing all over EVERYTHING. 

He's chasing his brother around and snatching up toys. 

There is no place in the living room that he hasn't discovered. No toy he hasn't licked. 

And he usually is smiling and laughing. 

His favorite place to crawl into is the shelf on the coffee table. He loves crawling in one side and out the other. There's no stopping him. 

He's discovered that he can tip over the baskets to get the toys inside. 

He's learned that everything is a toy and he loves playing. 

Now that he has discovered the stairs, there's no keeping him off them. 

When he's in the car seat he makes the funniest noises and faces. 

He appreciates any help he can get. 

And he's always looking to see who's chasing him, cuz someone usually is. And it's usually me. 

This boy sure is giving me a run for my money.  Now I chase 2 tornado boys around. We've taken drastic measures, we've got the gates up so everyone is locked in the living room. 

I sure do love my boys. But they are growing up so fast. Slow down. Please. 

Birthday boy

Happy happy birthday Danger dear.
Happy days will come to you all year.
If I had a wish then it would be,
A happy happy birthday to you from me.

It started with a balloon avalanche. 

He enjoyed it. 

He decided he wanted a Lego birthday party. I made a Lego cake for him. 

Lego Party complete with giant sausages and croissants. 

I got some birthday kisses from him on his birthday!

Party number 2 with grandparents. More cake and more fun!

Danger getting silly with a gift from grandpa. 

Even this cutie enjoyed the day, even tho he didn't get any cake. 

Daddy playing trains with the boys. Colonel just attacked the trains. Danger had fun keeping him away. :)

I can't believe my little man is 3. The little human that made me a mom, is 3! It has been so crazy to think about. Especially when sometimes it still shocks me and catches me off guard : I'M A MOM! And now I have a 3 year old. He is so big and strong and so into and aware of everything. 

I love my sweet little boy. I am so grateful for him. So grateful to be his mom.