Friday, June 27, 2014

I will fight for you.

Dear kids:

Today we went to the children's museum. I know, there are tons of them, just know this one was freaking huge. We went with cousins and grandmas. We ate lunch together, and even dad came to visit on his lunch break. Then, I let you go play with your cousins while your amazing aunt kept an eye on you. Once I joined her, relieved her of duty, whatever, it noticed how good you were playing. She even said you had been so polite and had been sharing some of the balls- which I know is hard, because throwing balls and kicking balls is your favorite. Well, then she ran to help your cousin go down a slide, you tried to escape and I got cornered by an angry mom. Supposedly, you sat on or squished her kids face into the carpet. 

Alright now, I know sometimes you don't like to share, but I also know you don't give up on stuff that easy. And if at any time during the 5-10 mintutes you were with your aunt you sat on this kid, I know you'd still be pulling on his clothes or rubbing his face in the carpet. I know you. You're stubborn. Just like me. I love you for being like me. You don't change back from a bad mood that fast, and you sure as heck do NOT give in to your peers that fast and then forget about it. 

So, I kinda figured what she was saying wasn't true. But she yelled at me. Yelled at me for not watching you better, for not teaching you to be nice, for not keeping an eye on you to her level of satisfaction. Oh man. That did NOT sit well with your momma momma. I hollered at her back. (No cuss words, thank you!) She said I should teach my big kids to treat little kids better, to which I replied HE'S TWO!!!! I told her I was doing the best that I can (I need to do better) and I had been watching you, and you didn't do any of those things (I'm not very good at watching you) and then I told her to freaking chill out and back off. 

You are a good boy. You are amazing and wonderful, so creative and curious. I love being your mom. And you are getting so much better at being nicer and sharing is becoming easier. I also understand, it's not fair, in your eyes, that I ask you and make you share and be nice when so many of the kids around are not being either of those things. You're two year sold and it's hard to understand. Trust me, sometimes even I don't understand being nice to kids my age when they aren't nice to me, but we do it anyway. It's part of being big. And it sucks. 

She yelled at me, and it didn't make me feel good. She called me a bad mom, and that hurt so much. How dare she make a blanket statement on a single incident, no matter how big or small. How dare she cut down another mother, regardless if today is the ONE day all year I've worn makeup and actually look "all put together." It hurt how she could just yell and holler and say those things. But I understand the mama bear coming out when her little ones were in danger, cuz your mama's bad guy face came out real quick! I understand where she's coming from. I just wish it had been spoken differently. 

BUT...

I will fight for you. No matter what. I will always have your back, I will always be by your side. If you sat on some kids face in the ball pit, it's probably because he pushed you down or took a ball out of your hands. Yes, we need to work on speaking our feelings instead of acting our feelings, but that's a lesson for another day. Right now, I want you to know you can come to me for ANYTHING. I will fight for you. Always. 

The rest of the day went great. You had fun running away from me. It was all good until about the last hour, when you started to get all diabolical and junk. You're pretty sneaky and darn near invisible when you hide among the other children. 

I love you my little man cubs!

Love - mama bear

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