Saturday, August 17, 2013

Things I've learned

Ok so there's loads I know now that I didn't know before I became a mom. Some of these lessons were a hard learn. Some were sorta easy. Some just happened. Most of them were trial and error. But all of them have helped me be a good mom.

It's ok to throw out the medicine cups that come with EVERY bottle of medicine. I don't need 30 of them!! I keep the hard plastic ones, and toss the flimsy ones. My silverware drawer has never been happier. Same goes for medicine bottles! I'm tossing those things out!!

It's also ok to throw out dishes. We have a nice 4 place set and we also have a really nice 10 place set that I only use on holidays (when I remember!) but all other days of the week we have the plastic ones from Walmart. I can get 4 cups, or plates or bowls for $1. Each year I buy a different color. Last year was green, this year is orange. After a year of us sawing them with steak knives and microwaving them, they NEED to be tossed. And they are way easy to clean!!

Sometimes movie days are awesome. When I've got a deadline and I have to get something finished, I know I can pop in The Incredibles or Wreck it Ralph and I know Danger will sit and watch them in their entirety. On a good day, he'll watch them both, back to back. I get LOADS done on those days. They don't happen too often, I don't want those movies to lose their magic!

Some days, I struggle, and I've only got 1 child. Man oh man, if I have a hard time, that mom I see with 3 kids must a rough day like every other day!! We all have it hard, being a mom is the hardest job, except maybe mining coal or being an underwater welder... 

Sometimes all I need is to talk to an adult and have them listen, answer questions, and, you know, NOT ignore me. Let's  face it, talking to children all day is tiring, both mentally and emotionally. Having even the smallest amount of adult interaction is so beneficial! Even if its the cashier at Walmart or the person on the other end of the order at the drive thru! I've been trying to reach out to my fellow moms and say "Hey! How are you doing?" cuz sometime, that's what that mom really wants, really needs. 

Mommas can always use a friend. Say hi, have your kid wave to theirs, compliment her shoes, go on walks, drop a text to say hey, go out to lunch at a restaurant with a play place, go to the park, go get a Slurpee, go to the store, invite her over to watch a movie, teach her something, learn from her. Try a find a way to reach out to the fellow mommas in your area. It won't hurt anything, and you might find a really good friend or 2. Plus it'll give you time to relax, both o you, and it'll also give you that much needed adult interaction. 

Next thing : stinky bums. We can tell the kid has a messy butt. Seriously, we can tell, we can smell them from like 5 feet away. I have 1 child, and if something stinks in the house, it's usually him. This is all true, then why, oh why, do I ALWAYS stick my nose right up to his bum and take a big ol' whiff??? I've been trying to not get so close to sniff him. Cuz if he's messy, I don't need to be a 1/2 inch away! I did it again this morning! I swear I almost died! 

You can pick what your kids watch, unless you give them the free choice. Danger is still to little for choices, he's got no idea what I mean when I say pick one. So I pick. I pick Jake and the Neverland Pirates or Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood. He doesn't know what Barney or Yo Gabba Gabba is, cuz I don't want to watch them. I've seen clips of them and cannot tolerate those songs playing over and over. So I pick what he watches. Now, I'm always sure to pick something within his age bracket and learning, and something that will capture his attention. Thankfully there are lots of shows out there that fall within those categories. And every once in a while, we throw in some old school shows, like Chip N Dale and Ducktales and He-Man. He enjoys those too. Yeah, ok so I know it's a little selfish, but momma has to keep her sanity!

It's ok, I know I use as little effort as possible. I know it, and it's ok. Danger has more energy than a Red Bull factory. I wish it could transfer to me, but it can't. We've blocked off the kitchen and upstairs rooms. He has free reign of the living room and his bedroom. I try reall hard to keep anything destroy-able OUT of the living room. Because if it can break, he will break it. Plus it helps me, so I don't have to chase him every minute and I don't have to follow him saying NO all the time. Part of me still uses my pacemaker as an excuse, and that's true sometimes. But for the most part, I want him to explore everything! And he does! He's into everything. And that's ok, he's learning about his world, and his momma lets him. 

It's all about the reaction. Danger loves putting on a show. He loves being cheered and clapped at and high-fived. If he falls down, he might start the pouty-face but we start clapping him and cheering for him he instantly perks up and keeps running. I've learned the kids (or anyone) can't be sad when they are being cheered! You can't be sad when everyone is telling you how awesome you are! If we react "oh no, that's so sad, oh you're hurt, are you ok? come here I'll give you a hug" he cries even more than just being hurt. He milks it for all it's worth. So we react with awesomeness and he goes on being awesome.

It's ok to use your child as a napkin. If I get something on my hands, I wipe it on his shirt. I have taught him to wipe his hands on his own shirt, he does it when I ask him and when he's got something on his hands.... So if I've something on my hands that I don't want to wipe on my clothes (yes that's how I roll...) and then it just melts into the mess on his shirt. Yup... today I even wiped my face on his shirt... I found a relatively clean-ish spot and wiped the pizza sauce from my face...It's ok.

Ok, we're expecting our 2nd here come March... And for a long while I was against having 2 so soon. I knew if I had 2 kids a year apart or something crazy like that I would go insane. I honestly don't think I would be able to handle 2 kids so close together. Shark and I had talked about it and we decided to start trying again when Danger turned 18 months. Well, in January I had a change of heart. If you did the math, you know that Danger wasn't 18 months old until May. After the initial happiness, excitement, surprise - I kinda went into shock a bit. But we wouldn't have tried for another if Shark and I weren't comfortable with having 2 running around. A friend shared this blogpost on Facebook, it's a post from The Shortstop blog. It is seriously, such an awesome post. It's a feel-good mom post. It helped me out so much! It was so good!

And guess what, I'm still learning!!

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